


man-eater

by iridilea



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternative Universe - FBI, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/F, Flashbacks, I UPDATE SO SLOW I AM TRYING OKAY, Inspired by Hannibal, Minor Character Death, Murder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, i do not know what i'm doing, jungeun has anxiety
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:28:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27547600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iridilea/pseuds/iridilea
Summary: “Special agent, Kim Jungeun.”“Dr. Jung Jinsol. Psychiatry.”An unlikely duo, catching an even more unlikely killer. What would Jungeun do, when she finds out her psychiatrist is hiding a deep, dark secret? And what's more, that the culprit she seeks is right under her nose?
Relationships: Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 6
Kudos: 58





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FBI Academy instructor Kim Jungeun receives a task: to get back into the field and lend the FBI her extraordinary crime scene analysis abilities once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this isn't really my best work but i want to continue with it, the first chapter is short but i swear later chapters are going to be longer just bear with me

“And that… was the case of the Ladykiller, one of the many cases showing the flaws in the system that we have to correct. You’re dismissed for the day, please exit  _ quietly _ unless you don’t want to come to class tomorrow, I already feel a migraine coming on.”

The class chuckled quietly at her last statement, the rustling of papers and bags filling the room. Jungeun put a knuckle to one of her temples, sighing while she slumped back into her chair. Her students filed out of the lecture hall quietly, though they started to talk the moment they were out the door.  _ Oh well. It was better than nothing. _

“Kim Jungeun?” A familiar voice.

“Haseul,” she smiled at the woman, “I mean- Agent Jo.” She corrected herself, remembering that this was her senior.

“Haseul is fine,” she heard a chuckle, “we’ve known each other since the Academy, loosen up a bit!”

“Is there anything you needed?” She was still avoiding eye contact, instead opting to look at the piles of notes on her desk, which she shuffled around awkwardly to keep her hands busy.

“Yes, actually. I need you to help me with something.”

“What is it?”

“Do you fancy a walk?” Quietly nodding, Jungeun got up from her seat, reaching for her sunglasses. “Migraine?” Haseul frowned, to which she responded with a defeated sigh.

“I’m assuming that means yes,” the older woman shook her head, “do you need any pain medication?”

“I’m good, thanks for asking. What did you want to talk to me about?” Even with the sunglasses on, she still squinted under the bright sun.

“I need you for a case. Simple B&E, one victim. Would that be okay? Today doesn’t really seem like a good day for you, so if you want to sit it out-”

“No no no, it’s fine! I’d be happy to. It’s about time I went and got a case study firsthand instead of reading from old files. It’ll get boring if I keep telling them about ancient cases, you know?” Jungeun forced a grin at her superior, hoping that she’d buy it.

“That’s great, then,” Haseul heaved a sigh of relief, “I’ll drive.”

She must have zoned out, as they were in the parking lot of the academy before she knew it. Maybe today wasn’t such a good day after all. But she couldn’t back out now, so she just followed what she was told to do.

They arrived at the scene, Jungeun realising she didn’t miss the flashing lights, loud sirens and constant tension that enveloped her one bit as she stepped foot out of the car. Ignoring the whispers from her coworkers- probably about her. It’s always about her.

She felt Haseul’s hand leave her shoulder. “Okay Jungeun, do your thing.”

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she imagined the murder happening. She could see herself in the place of the culprit - she  _ was  _ the murderer in this scenario.

She kicked down the door. The oak swung open, hinges creaking as it strained against the sudden force. The wood hit the wall with a loud  _ slam _ . Way to make an entrance.

A woman screamed. Her victim - Mrs. Kim.

Turning towards her target, she fired one loud, clear shot which rang across the neighbourhood. But she didn’t care. She was here for one purpose, and one purpose alone. But she was running out of time. Mrs. Kim had triggered the alarm, and the home security service she contracted would be here any minute.

Looking down at the fallen woman in front of her-  _ she’s still alive? _ Cocking her pistol once more, she shot one, two, three, four,  _ five _ more times until she was sure that the body was limp and cold.

This was her design.

“The perpetrator is a man in his forties. He shot once at the victim, Mrs. Kim, hitting her lower back. By some lucky chance, he was able to paralyse her- the bullet had lodged itself in her spinal cord, damaging her central nervous system to the point of instant paralysis of the waist down.” She snapped out of her trance, instantly reporting her findings.

“That was fast,” Haseul remarked, “You got all that from just one look?”

“Oh. I probably should explain, then. Judging by the bloody footprints on the floor, that’s about a men’s size 8. The multiple gunshot wounds- probably a crime of passion, so he probably knew this woman. Mrs. Kim doesn’t have any children, and most of her acquaintances are around her age. So yes, a man in his forties.”

“That doesn’t explain how you concluded she got shot in the spinal cord, specifically.”

“The wound in her back has the most blood coming out of it. So I assumed it was the first place he shot. The corpse is also positioned weird, almost as if she was trying to crawl away with her arms, but her legs wouldn’t follow,” Jungeun tapped her chin, “You see here?” She pointed at a bullet wound just above the corpse’s hips, “That’s somewhere around the tailbone, so I just guessed that it had hit the spinal cord.”

“Jesus Christ. Why the hell are you not on the field?” Haseul asked, then looked as if she mentally smacked herself in instant regret. “Shit. Sorry, I forgot.”

“It’s okay,” Jungeun sighed. “Where was her husband at the time of the crime?” She changed the subject, almost too eagerly.

“Teaching at Yale,” Haseul shook her head, “His alibi checks out.”

“Any former lovers, people she owes a debt to, or someone who just really hates her guts?”

“We’re looking into it, but that narrows our searches a lot. Thanks.”

“No problem, Seul,” Jungeun smiled halfheartedly. Haseul looked like she wanted to say something. “Aren’t you going to ask me to get back in the field?” She asked, already expecting the older woman’s answer.

“How did you-” The agent-in-charge looked at her, wide-eyed, “Yeah. Secret’s out, I guess. I can’t get anything past you.”

“What happened?”

“There’s a special case, Jungeun. A case we can’t solve.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> curiouscat.qa/iridilea leave me something?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungeun doesn't exactly make the best first impression on her first day, but she gets to reconnect with some old friends and make some new ones. Her first psych eval was also a mess, it seems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's getting better please bear with me

“Welcome back,  _ Special _ Agent Kim Jungeun.”

She knew that voice. This wasn’t good.

“Hey, Sooyoung,” she sighed, “I hope you didn’t miss me too much.”

“ _ Miss _ you?” The other girl scoffed, “I was having the time of my life before you decided to show up again.”

“Good to know. I’ll stay out of your way, then,” Jungeun was about to walk away, before she heard another loud shriek that stopped her in her tracks.

“Jungie!” Some… flying  _ thing _ tackled her in a hug. Struggling to hold her ground, she blinked twice before she registered who it was.

“Jiwoo! I haven’t seen you in forever!” Grinning, she returned the hug, astonished to see her childhood friend. “I thought you were doing your PhD in Korea!”

“That was ages ago, idiot,” Jiwoo swatted her arm playfully, “Call me Dr. Jiwoo now.”

“Of course,  _ doctor _ ,” Jungeun laughed, booping her friend’s nose teasingly. “Are you here to give me a psych eval?”

“Nah,” she shrugged.

“Huh?”

“I told Haseulie that I was too close to you. There might be a conflict of interest,” Jiwoo explained, showing her teeth in a wide smile. Always the professional.

“Makes sense. Who’s doing my psych eval then? If she wants me back on the field…” Jungeun furrowed her brows, confused.

“Not sure. There’s this psychiatrist that people are talking about, apparently she’s like, super famous and super well qualified! I feel kinda threatened, if you ask me,” her friend joked, crossing her arms and pouting like a child who didn’t get candy.

Whoever that psychiatrist was, Jungeun was already feeling intimidated by the way that Jiwoo had described her. She imagined a tall, lanky woman with dark hair pulled into a bun, wearing horn-rimmed glasses… or maybe she was just describing her image of an older authority figure. Who knows? Maybe she was well into her forties, judging from the qualifications Jiwoo was rattling on about.

“So, like, she got her PhD  _ while _ she was working at John Hopkins! Can you believe it? She was apparently one of the most famous surgeons in the world, before transferring and re-training in Psychiatry! She found it so interesting that she actually wrote her thesis on it, refuting research by Bowlby, which is such an essential in Psychology that even high school students are taught about it! I swear, she really redefined the entire world of Psychology when she…”

Jungeun was spacing out as she talked, nodding absently as she couldn’t help but train her eyes on a blonde woman in the distance.  _ She was pretty _ , she thought,  _ and she looked like someone she could tell all her secrets to, then apologise for taking up her time while she sat and giggled at her saying, “no, it’s no problem at all!” _ She looked like a nice person.

That’s what she  _ looked _ like.

She couldn’t help but feel uneasy when the woman entered her field of vision. Maybe it was just her being irrational, but there was something off about her. Something… didn’t seem right.

“Who’s that?” She found herself asking on impulse, “a new recruit, or something?”

“No idea,” Jiwoo shrugged, “this is my first time seeing her, too- oh look, she’s talking to Haseul.”

“Is it just me or are they walking over?” Fuck. She didn’t know what to say in scenarios like these. If only Haseul told her a new recruit was coming, she could’ve prepared something to say to her, or something. Did she ever teach this girl at the Academy? She looked young enough to have been one of her students. How would she start the conversation? Would a simple hi be enough? Would it be-

“Hey. It’s okay. Let me do the talking,” Jiwoo noticed her friend becoming increasingly on edge, snapping her out of her thoughts. Jungeun wasn’t the best at social interactions, she knew from being friends - her  _ only _ friend all throughout high school. It all made sense when she was diagnosed in their final year, right before college. Anxiety was no joke, and not everyone was the most accepting of her, either.

“Thanks, Jiwoo.”

“No problem,” she squeezed Jungeun’s right bicep lightly to ground her. She could feel her friend tensing up as Haseul and the unknown woman walked closer, which was to no surprise. It had always been quite hard for her to meet new people, only socialising whenever Jiwoo was by her side. She thought a lot. Some would even say she thought too much, overthinking every little thing about everyone she met.

“Everyone, can I have your attention please?” Haseul’s presence was commandeering, very fitting for a leader. The room immediately fell silent, turning towards their agent-in-charge and the woman standing next to her.

“I’d like to introduce to you Dr. Jung Jinsol. She’ll be working with us from now on, alongside Dr. Kim.” Jiwoo chuckled a little at that statement - Haseul never referred to her that formally unless she was trying to keep up appearances.

“I’m looking forward to it,” the blonde woman smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. Her voice was silky smooth, the consistency of coffee with a lot of milk added into it. She was  _ attractive _ , Jungeun admitted to herself, the deadly type of attractive.

The room broke out into applause- but it was more like courteous clapping in the workplace when someone you didn’t know announced that it was their birthday, or when someone got praised by their boss and the room was told to applaud them. Slightly reluctant,  _ very _ awkward.

“Jungeun, can you come with us to my office?” Haseul whispered to her, as everyone went back to their usual duties.

“Oh. Sure.” Normally her heart would have dropped straight to the floor, but she knew what this was about, thanks to Jiwoo.

“Let’s get straight to it, shall we?” Her superior leaned forward in her seat behind the desk, while Jungeun and Jinsol sat on two separate chairs in front of her. This was more than slightly uncomfortable, Jungeun noted to herself. Not only because of the chair occasionally creaking whenever she moved around, but also her  _ unease _ at being in the same room as this person she barely knew.

“Of course,” Jungeun nodded, trying to mask her discomfort.

“So, in order to get you back on the field, we need you to get a psychological evaluation. Dr. Jung here will be helping you with that, and you can always go to her for any concerns.”

“Got it. When’s the first session?” She honestly just wanted to get out of there.

“When are you free tomorrow?” Jinsol asked her, suddenly breaking her silence. Jungeun jumped involuntarily, to which the doctor creased her eyebrows slightly in worry.

“Uh,” she stammered, “My last class is at uh,” she frantically patted her pockets, reaching for her phone, “four. I mean, it ends at four.”

“That’s cool. Could you get to my office by five? It’s a ten minute walk away from the Academy, so you’ll be fine. I’ll email you the address.”

“Yeah. Sounds good to me,” Jungeun forcibly bit back her doubt, an impending sense of doom looming over her shoulder.

“I’ll see you then,” did she just  _ wink  _ at her? Her  _ client _ ?

“You’re free to go, Dr. Jung,” Haseul nodded at her, to which she replied, “Jinsol is fine, Agent.”

“Alright, then please call me Haseul as well.”

The doctor got up and out of her chair smoothly, taking long strides towards the door, shutting it behind her as she exited gracefully. Jungeun  _ physically _ felt her shoulders relax as the stranger left.

“I really do hope you’re okay with this. I was going to ask Jiwoo to help you with the psych eval, but she wanted to stay professional, which I understand completely, but I honestly feel like it would have been better for you if she’d done it instead.” Haseul pressed a knuckle to her temple, leaning against her desk.

“About the case you wanted me to work on- what is it about?” She inquired curiously, glancing at the corkboard full of names and faces she couldn’t recognise.

“People are disappearing all over the country. More specifically, couples. Eight couples, sixteen people,” the agent sighed, running a tired hand through her hair, “I’ve been up all night trying to find a correlation, but that’s all I got.”

“Any bodies? Are these people still alive?”

“About the bodies… not a clue. We’re thinking the killer either burned them, dissolved them in acid, or, well.”

“You can say ‘ate them’, Haseul.” Jungeun whirled around to see Sooyoung leaning against the doorframe to the office.

“Yes, thank you for that  _ valuable _ input,” Haseul sighed, “Yeah. They might have been eaten.”

“That’s weird,” Jungeun furrowed her brows as she peered at the pictures closely, “Are you sure this isn’t some serial missing persons case? Someone might have, I don’t know, sixteen people in their basement.”

“No one keeps that many people in their basement,” Sooyoung pointed out the obvious.

“I know. I was being sarcastic. Maybe it’s some sort of obsession with couples. A broken heart, maybe?”

“Cute. Let’s call this one the Broken Hearts Killer.”

“I don’t see why not,” Haseul offered, then pressed on, “You were saying about the couples?”

“All of these couples look different. They’re not just the usual boy-meets-girl heterosexual couple. Can this also be a hate crime?”

“Possibly, but don’t forget couple number 4. Joshua and May Lewis. Mundane names, probably also a mundane couple,” Sooyoung sighed. When she wasn’t hell-bent on proving Jungeun wrong, she could be quite useful sometimes.

“You’re right,” she could almost hear her unofficial ‘rival’ seethe at her acknowledgement, “Is that enough to conclude that it isn’t just the token quote-on-quote ‘normal’ couple to take suspicion away from it being a hate crime?”

“I’ve background checked everyone,” Haseul spoke up, “they are painstakingly normal, so maybe Jungeun has a point here.”

“Or maybe I’m wrong, and this killer kills for love. They don't care what kind of love it is. Maybe they want to  _ be _ loved, or they want to love someone.” The words she spoke sounded hauntingly familiar to her. Jungeun began to space out, gripping the back of a chair tightly for support. She just hoped her coworkers didn’t notice. “They’re coping with a loss. They lost something important to them- some _ one _ important to them. A lover. Or p… hold on. I think I need to lie down.”

With that, Jungeun fell back onto the chair, holding her head in her hands. The world swam around her, Haseul and Sooyoung’s voices a blur as she closed her eyes, fighting back the wave of nausea that overtook her. “Get Jiwoo,” she heard someone say. Was that Haseul? She didn’t even realise that she was already struggling to breathe, her rib cage rattling as she drew her next breaths.

When did it get so cold?

She shivered as if the temperature of the room dropped by a hundred degrees, holding her head in her hands as she tried to calm herself. _No, not now,_ not when she had been without a panic attack for months. She could review cases like this with ease when she was teaching- why was this happening now?

“Jungie, can you hear me?”

“Ah,  _ fuck _ ,” she choked out, her voice barely a whisper as she hyperventilated. This was so embarrassing.

“Jungeun,” Jiwoo’s voice echoed through the cesspool that was her mind, breaking through her barriers. “Jungeun, I need you to breathe, okay? Match my pace.”

Slowly, she removed her hands from where they were clutching at the back of her head, looking up slowly at her friend.  _ In and out. In and out. _ Her first few gulps of air came out as shrill gasps, before she could make direct eye contact with those warm brown eyes she knew so well.

Jungeun’s breathing slowed.

Haseul had let her go early. It wasn’t a surprise to her, considering the scene she made in her office. Maybe Jinsol could help. She was supposed to see her tomorrow, anyway.

What the hell was she supposed to do now? Would Haseul pull her off the job, seeing her current state?

_ Jinsol would have answers, _ she thought,  _ for now I just have to get to sleep. _

“Hello, old friend,” she sighed as she popped open her bedside bottle of sleeping pills. She thought she’d take them just in case - her anxious state right now probably would not let her sleep, as much as she physically felt tired.

Her thoughts swam around in her head, the same head that lay down on her pillow, eyes shut and waiting for the drug to kick in. She wondered what kind of psychiatrist Jinsol was, comparing the mysterious woman to her previous tries at therapists and various kinds of treatment. She seemed nice enough at first glance, with those wide, doe-like eyes that seemed to radiate innocence. Jungeun remembered her first impression of the doctor: elegant,  _ beautiful _ even, making men and women alike swoon over her. But there was always a nagging feeling in her heart that… maybe… she couldn’t form legible sentences as the fifteen minute mark for the pills to start working passed. Feeling the drowsiness kick in, she hoped she wouldn’t have a nightmare tonight, counting on the sedative effect of the medicine to give her a dreamless sleep.

Her alarm rang the next morning.

Jungeun groaned as she pried herself away from the bed, tossing the covers roughly off her body as she struggled to sit up.  _ Thankfully, no nightmares _ . Sighing as she put one foot down on the carpeted floor, she trudged to her bathroom to wash up. She felt as if she hadn’t slept at all, thanks to the sleeping pills.

Checking her phone, she saw a notification from her emails. Right, she was supposed to see Jinsol today.

Had Haseul already told her about what happened yesterday? She wouldn’t be surprised. After all, the short-haired woman was nothing short of professional.

_ ‘Hope you feel better today! Tell me if you need anything,’ _ a text message from Jiwoo, along with a dozen heart emojis. She really never changed, Jungeun smiled to herself, before typing up a quick ‘thank you’ to her friend.

_ ‘By the way, I forgot to tell you, Sooyoung and I are a thing,’ _ the next message read, and her jaw dropped to the floor.

Jiwoo… and  _ who _ ?

Jungeun stifled a giggle imagining them together, a stone cold bitch and the personification of a ray of sunshine.  _ No, that was mean _ , she thought, maybe Sooyoung wasn’t as bad as she made herself out to be.

It didn’t matter. She had to get to her first class.

“The Chesapeake Ripper. Dr. Hannibal Lecter and former FBI personnel Will Graham are still wanted individuals, and the case remains one of the biggest unsolved cases we’ve ever had,” she rehearsed to herself under her breath as she walked up the stairs to her lecture hall, “it’s okay, Jungeun. Just use your confident voice. Fake it until you m-” she stopped in her tracks, seeing a gaggle of Academy students walk by. It would have been so embarrassing if they had heard her, so thank whoever was up there that she had stopped herself in time.

“The Ripper, as we at the Behavioural Sciences unit have lovingly dubbed him, kills his victims like a butcher at a slaughterhouse kills pigs. He sees his victims as food, and it’s safe to assume that he  _ eats _ them as well, considering Dr. Lecter’s… unique palate,” Jungeun addressed her students in the lecture hall, mentally preparing herself for the next powerpoint slide she was about to put up.

With a click of the remote, the class gasped at the sight. A woman’s gutted body, impaled by deer horns in the middle of a field, her body elevated above all else. “Putting his victims on display, this was the Ripper’s way of killing. Flamboyant and confident, he saw his crime scenes as pieces of art. This was a very unique case to the FBI, and it still remains a mystery where the two prime suspects went, almost five years ago.”

Her students stirred at the time that passed from when they last heard from the Ripper, whispers of  _ “that’s still pretty recent” _ and  _ “is he still out there?” _ echoing across every row. Jungeun stood in silence as her class grasped the revelation, watching as their faces turned to masked shock and fear before their attention returned to her.

“For now, the search for the suspects has been put on hold, as there haven’t been any cases similar to the Ripper’s style of killing as of now. He is assumed to be missing, or dead, but at any sign of him, agents  _ will _ be deployed to stop him,” she tried to reassure them, “you’ve taken in a lot of information today,” she checked the clock,  _ almost four _ . “You’re dismissed,” she sighed, watching as her students packed their bags. She had to make her way to Jinsol’s place, now that she was done with her class.

“Hey,” she knew that voice.

“Jiwoo,” Jungeun grinned at the figure approaching her. Of course, Sooyoung was standing near the door, arms crossed and a bored look on her face.

“I couldn’t help but listen in,” her friend beamed, “you did amazing!”

“Fake it until you make it, that’s all,” she laughed halfheartedly, eyes trained on her friend’s girlfriend who was also her self-proclaimed rival.

“Oh, Sooyoung?” Observant as ever, Jiwoo picked up on where Jungeun was looking in a heartbeat. “We’re about to go on a date.”

“I see. You have fun, I have a session with Dr. Jung to go to.”

“Jinsol? She’s pretty nice, from what I’ve seen. Don’t worry too much about it,” Jiwoo clapped her on the back, making Jungeun jump from the impact.

“Ow,” she complained, “how are you so strong and not an agent?”

“Don’t wanna be one,” Jiwoo shook her head, “I’m not good with guns. They’re scary.”

“You’d rather use your fists instead?” Jungeun joked, but to her surprise, Jiwoo nodded.  _ That is slightly terrifying _ , she thought to herself.

“I’ll leave you be for now,” her friend smiled wide, “Let’s go, babe!” She called to her girlfriend, who followed her out the door.

Was it just her, or did Sooyoung just  _ smile _ ?

“How have you been?” Jinsol’s silky voice snapped her out of her trance.

“I’m sure you’ve heard from Haseul, Dr. Jung,” she sighed, fiddling with her thumbs.

“I’d like to hear it from you,” the doctor leaned forward, elbows on her knees and chin resting on her intertwined fingers. If a girl that  _ wasn’t _ her psychiatrist looked at Jungeun like this, she would probably faint. Her three-piece suit wasn’t helping either- but why the hell was she thinking about this now?

“Jungeun?” Jinsol called her back to reality, “are you alright?”

“Yeah uh, I’m fine. Just spacing out,” Jungeun shook her head rapidly, “I’ve been horrible, as you probably know. I had a panic attack yesterday.”

“Do you mind telling me about that?”

“Haseul called me back to the field because she wanted me to solve a case. It was going fine until I realised the suspect’s pattern was surrounding couples… so I tried to think of a possible motive.”

“And what was the motive, if you don’t mind telling me?” Jinsol pressed on, her presence somehow commandeering despite her soft features.

“I concluded that they were jealous. Killing couples is often a product of jealousy. I thought that they might have recently gone through a breakup, or that they-” Jungeun sucked in a deep breath through her nose, “might have lost their parents, literally or metaphorically.”

“Metaphorically?” Her psychiatrist raised a brow at her, confused.

“I was referring to child abuse,” she deadpanned.

“Oh.”

“I think I might have had that attack because,” she bit the inside of her cheek out of nervousness, not ready to reveal everything to a person she just met.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, you know,” Jinsol told her softly, staring straight at her with those wide, round eyes.

“No, it’s- I want to. I need to get this out of the way so I can help Haseul with the case.”

“Okay.”

“As a child,” Jungeun swallowed the lump in her throat threatening to rise up, “I was orphaned.” Jinsol didn’t say anything, instead nodding attentively.

“My parents were killed by a burglar. He tied them up, put a gun to their heads and-” she noticed her breathing was getting quicker, taking a few shaky breaths to calm herself down. Jinsol handed her a box of tissues wordlessly, and it was only then that she realised she was tearing up.

“Fuck, I’m really sorry-” she apologised profusely, dabbing at her cheeks and watching the amalgamation of makeup and tears come off.

“Don’t apologise,”  _ how the hell is she staying so patient?  _ “Take your time, my whole afternoon is free.”

Recollecting herself, Jungeun recounted that night which plagued her nightmares ever since.

“Please, I’m begging you, not my daughter,” she remembered waking up to her mother’s muffled sobs coming from the living room downstairs.

“Shut up, woman,” a strange, gruff voice she’d never heard before. Jungeun’s heart dropped. This wasn’t good. “If only you gave us the money, we wouldn’t have to kill you.”

_ Kill? _

“We’ve already given you everything, can you please just let us go?” It was her dad. She’d never heard him so afraid before, his tone quivering as she heard a click. It sounded awfully like the loading of a gun that she’d heard when she snuck in on her father watching action movies.  _ It couldn’t be. Could it? _

Her breath catching in her chest, she snuck out from under her covers and into the dark corridor. Maybe her parents just had a guest over, or they were just watching a vaguely surreal movie. Jungeun hoped that that was the truth. Careful not to let her footsteps attract any unwanted attention, she tiptoed across the wooden floorboards, watching out for any sudden movements.

“Our daughter is only eight years old, please don’t kill us,” her mother pleaded again, “you don’t want her to grow up without parents, do you? She’d have a good life, don’t you want that?” She had just reached the end of the corridor when she heard her mother’s cries.

“Shut the fuck up!”

_ Wham! _ The unknown man whacked her mother over the head with the butt of his pistol. “That should stop this bitch from talking for a while,” he barked to his subordinate while Jungeun cowered in her hiding spot on top of the stairs. She could hear her father sobbing as he looked over at his wife, a slight trail of blood oozing from the wound on her forehead.

Her father was shocked speechless at how violent the invaders were. He couldn’t do anything but hang his head low as the tears dripped down his cheeks and onto his lap. He only hoped that his daughter was safe and sound, far away from what was happening - and better yet, that she had already left the house through a window.

Little did he know she was right there, watching it all unfold.

“Did you get everything?” The man threatening her parents asked the other person with him.

“All the valuable things I can find, yes.”

“And the second floor?”

_ Crap _ . She was on the second floor. Her heart pounded in her chest as she awaited the response to the question.

“There wasn’t anything up there,” the other person lied. They hadn’t been up there, as far as she knew. She would have heard them if they were.

“Okay,” the man bought the excuse. “Now let’s shoot these motherfuckers and get out of here, before the neighbours realise something is off and call the cops on us.”

“Do we really have to? I mean- can’t we just leave?”

“Maybe  _ you’re _ here to steal. I’m here so I can finally do what I’ve always wanted to do.”

Jungeun’s blood ran cold. So the man wasn’t planning on sparing her parents in the first place. He wasn’t going to spare  _ her _ either, now that she thought of it. Hugging her knees to her chest, her breathing quickened as she saw the man inching closer to her parents, bound and gagged on the same chairs they dined on in the living room.

Was this a dream? Maybe if she closed her eyes, she’d find herself awake in her bed, her mother calling for her to have breakfast, the light shining through her window as it always did. As it normally did.

But there was no more normal. She wasn’t ever going to wake up from this nightmare.

She just wanted to cry as she looked on helplessly, her body knowing that it would mean sure death if she ran downstairs to her parents. Her legs wouldn’t move, no matter what she tried to do. She could only sit there, hugging her knees to her chest, hoping that she wouldn’t be discovered.

The man with the pistol moved again, cocking the gun once more as he pointed it straight between her mother’s eyes.  _ No! _ She wanted to scream, but all that came out of her throat was a raspy whisper.

Watching as he drew closer to the unconscious woman on the chair, Jungeun was frozen to the spot. She couldn’t even close her eyes as she watched everything unfold before her.

The man propped her mother’s head up, free hand grasping her jaw as her father looked away, doing the one thing she couldn’t as the love of his life was about to be murdered in front of him.

“I’m going to enjoy this,” he sneered as he edged closer, his spit landing on her mother’s face.

_ Bang! _ Just like that, her mother was dead. She lay lifeless on her chair, like a ragdoll being tossed aside after playtime. As she stared at her empty expression, the gaping bullet wound in her forehead stared back at her.

All the memories of her mother came rushing back to her. Breakfasts with her family on Sunday mornings, picking her up from school on sunny afternoons, driving with her mum on the highway, going somewhere for the weekend… all those things that she once took for granted were all gone now.

A new emotion began to form in her stomach. Later she found out that wasn’t an emotion, but the feeling of nausea as her eyes wandered towards the splatter of blood that covered the walls behind where her mother was shot.

“Now, it’s your turn.”

He turned towards her father, and Jungeun tried her best to keep quiet even though she knew what was coming next.  _ Please, _ she prayed to the gods above,  _ please don’t let my dad die too. _

Her father’s sniffles brought her back to reality as he couldn’t even string a legible sentence together, the man in the dark holding his head in place by the jaw as he did with her mother. “You poor, poor man. You just saw your wife die, and now you’re going to die too. It’s okay, though. Your beloved daughter will be joining you shortly.”

“No, please don’t, please! She’s only a child, she has so much to live for, even if it’s without us, please don’t kill her, she  _ has _ to live! I don’t care if I die-”

The lone gunshot rang out into the neighbourhood as he said his last words. Ironic, wasn’t it, that her dad died pleading for her life?

Her parents’ murderer set his pistol down, throwing his head back and looking at the ceiling in a brief moment of silence. A gurgle sounded at the back of his throat, the sound almost inhuman as he  _ laughed _ .

“Aha! Hahaha,” the man hunched down, covering his face with one hand as he wheezed, his other hand holding onto the back of the chair for support. It was obvious, even to an eight year old that this man wasn’t the slightest bit mentally stable. Maybe this was her chance to escape. She could get out through a window and climb down a tree to safety-

“Look for their daughter. She’s still alive somewhere.” The window that was presented to her slammed shut. She was done for.

“What are you waiting for? Go find her!” The man ordered his partner, who was about to respond, before-

The door burst open, the lights of the streets shining into the dark living room. “Drop your weapons! Put your hands behind your head!”

But they were too late. The damage had already been done.

“And that’s how I ended up in years of therapy and medication,” Jungeun sighed, putting her head in her hands. Jinsol offered her a box of tissues, which she took with a curt “thanks”.

“I’m really sorry this happened to you,” the psychiatrist spoke to her in a low, calming voice.

“It’s not your fault. Whatever happened, happened.”

“Do you want some water?” Jinsol asked, already getting out of her seat.

“Uh- you don’t have to-” Jungeun could only follow her movements with her eyes as she walked to the pantry of her home-office.

“Here,” she returned soon after, holding a clear glass of water, “how are you doing?” and Jungeun made the mistake of looking straight into those clear, brown eyes that widened innocently when they made eye contact.

“I’m- I’m fine,” she had to tear her gaze away, feeling her cheeks turn hot. What was she doing? It wasn’t like her to get flustered this easily.

“Are you okay? You seem a little…”

“Yeah! I’m fine. Don’t worry about it,” she babbled, downing her water in a single gulp, much to Jinsol’s surprise. “Jesus Christ, I’ve been here long enough,” Jungeun’s eyes flitted towards the clock that hung on Jinsol’s walls, the simplistic design of the clock contrasting every other bit of the antique decor in the room.

“Hey, there’s no rush, I’m practically done-” her psychiatrist stretched out a hand to her, looking extremely confused.

“I… have to go back. I have uh. Dogs. To feed.” Jungeun wanted to smack herself up the head for her lame excuse. She didn’t even  _ have _ any dogs.

“Okay,” Jinsol giggled, “at least let me walk you out.”

“About the case, though,” Jungeun had looked back one last time before she stepped out of Jinsol’s door, “I don’t want to let Haseul down.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> curiouscat.qa/iridilea thoughts?


End file.
